Posts Tagged ‘pet loss’

I wish I had time to tell you.

I wish I had time to tell you about Free.  She was a beautiful lab mixed with some Border Collie so of course she was not only beautiful she was highly intelligent!  Smarter than most folks, four-legged or two-legged that I ever knew.

Free was the greatest teacher I’ve ever had.  She left her mark upon this earth and a good one it was!

My Greatest Teacher and most beloved 4legged, Free

Anyone who ever met Free instantly loved her.  “She sure looks like a happy dog,” many people would say.  I always thought it interesting that this is what most people saw when they looked at Free — happiness.

Free was happy when doctors said she ought not be.  “She’s wagging her tail and eating well,” they said with surprise when she had a cancerous tumor on her leg, which I will not talk about.

I can only talk about the happy memories.  The other part is too sad.

In Free’s last days on this earth, she showed me everything.  She showed me a place where things are okay.  A place where everything that happens can, in the end, be okay.  She showed me that the guilt I felt was not needed, even though my heart does still break.

My doctors said I needed antidepressants but I,  instead spent time with Free, lying close to her body, looking into her eyes and listening.  I cried the entire time.   Free showed me everything.  Everything that is beautiful.

I wish I had time to tell you all about it.  I wish I had time, and one day I will.  I’ll tell you about how her spirit came back to visit several times.  I do not believe what people say about dogs not having a spirit.  I just don’t!

Free’s spirit is awesome.  In the darkest moments after she passed she came.  She brought me messages.  The last time I saw her she reminded me of our agreement, which was that I would be okay and that one day I would get another dog.

It feels funny calling Free a dog.

Free’s spirit spoke and moved a woman in my life who is mostly responsible I think for me having the dog I have now.

I know they are dogs.  I know they are canines.  I do not think they are human.  Dogs are however living beings with feelings.  Dogs do actually rule!

I wish I had time to tell you how my good insect hunter I have now came and how Free had her earth angel helping her to help me.

Her earth angel’s name is Tiffany.  I wish I had time too to tell of her.

I don’t usually speak of spirits and angels.  I don’t pretend to understand how life works.  I just know what I’ve experienced.

So one day, when I have time, I will tell you.

I’ll tell you how my dogs save my life pretty much all the time and how it’s just fine for now.  I’ll tell you about how it is a dog that can make me feel needed and how important feeling needed is.


I AM FREE, an ode to my beloved companion

Remembering Free, with Love

This is Free in her element.
Resting in between swims along the river. Free was my companion, a loved family member, my son’s best buddy and the greatest teacher in life I’ve ever known.  I loved Free and I will always miss her.

Free, resting on rock beside, "Little" Wilson Creek

Free blessed this earth from 1993 - 2006 and forever lives in my heart



I once had four legs with webbed paws.

I swam in rivers, lakes, ponds and the ocean.

I plopped down in big ‘ol dirty mud puddles too.

I absolutely loved water!

I fetched sticks and balls

and anything my human friends would throw for me.

I loved it on earth!

I had a great human mom and a

terrific big brother to play with me.

I went camping and traveled around the country

with my human family.

We had lots of fun!

I loved them very much and they loved me too.

I once ran so fast into a stick

that I had to have surgery.

I was very enthusiastic about fetching!

I swam in nearly every river in the southeastern

United States.

I camped in most national forests.

I went all the way to New Mexico

and once lived on a horse farm in Texas.

I did lots of fun things during my life on earth.

I totally digged food and raw meat bones!

I ate all sorts of things that my human family

thought I shouldn’t have.

I once ate an entire bag of Halloween candy.

Chocolate, caramel, suckers, chewing gum,

even the paper.

I liked everything in the bag

except for the very hot red balls.

I tried each one but they were no fun.

I was a very good girl

but I did steal toys from neighbors.

I was kind of spoiled

and as I got older I didn’t care much

for other four-leggeds in my territory.

I did like one in particular.

I loved visiting her

and running in her grass.

She lived on a farm

at my human aunt’s house,

so I guess we were first

cousins through human relation.

I lived on earth almost 13 years.

That’s almost 90 human years!

I enjoyed my life and loved my family

I will tell of that

and our wonderful years together.

I want my human family to remember our fun times.

I want them happy when they think of me.

I am Free.

dogkisses, 2006 Red heart